When Virgil wrote that love overcomes all obstacles, he had clearly never been in a serious relationship. Yes, love can overcome many things, but if there’s one thing that it can’t overcome, it’s not being on the same page. At the end of the day, you and your partner need to be clear about fundamental decisions like where to live, when and if to have kids, and when you want to get married—because otherwise, the relationship will fall apart, and it won’t be amicable.
“Sixty-seven percent of disagreements in a relationship never get resolved and they don’t need to,” explains Lesli Doares, a certified relationship coach. “But the other 33 percent, if not resolved, can lead to the end of the relationship. Desires of one partner for the relationship to get more serious, personal beliefs and values, the kind of lifestyle each person wants to live, and wanting to have children are just some of the issues that need to be resolved if the relationship is going to survive. These are the ‘deal breaker’ issues.”
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