WE PROUDLY WEAR UGLY SWEATERS
One of the newest (and most beloved) American traditions involves the ugly Christmas sweater. While its origins are unclear, many of us remember receiving hideous holiday-inspired sweaters from well-meaning grandparents and aunts. Someone realized they were a treasure trove of awkward and turned them into a holiday staple. Now it’s common to have a few beloved ugly Christmas sweaters in our closets for all the ugly sweater parties we’ll undoubtedly get invited to each year.
WE SMOOCH UNDER THE MISTLETOE
The weird tradition of having to kiss someone if you’re both underneath the mistletoe has a long and sordid history. Greeks and Romans loved mistletoe for its apparent healing properties, and Celtic Druids noted the plant blossomed in winter, making it a sacred symbol of life, which later caught on in England during the Middle Ages. Somehow that translated into having to kiss whoever was next to you during the holidays. Another tradition that makes no sense, but we do it anyway.
SITTING ON SANTA’S LAP
For just a moment, imagine what our tradition of having kids sit on a mall-Santa’s lap to recite their wish list looks like to someone abroad (especially if they don’t celebrate Christmas). It’s kinda weird, right? Not only are we reinforcing holiday-centric greed, but we’re literally putting our children (even our infants) in the laps of strange men wearing fake beards so they’ll believe he’ll return on Christmas Eve, break into our homes and deliver the gifts they want. Let’s face it—this is one strange way to celebrate the season.
HOLIDAY PHOTO CARDS AND LONG, BORING LETTERS
Millions of families across the US go to a lot of trouble to take a perfect holiday photo that they’ll mail (along with an oddly detailed letter outlining everyone’s lives over the past year) each Christmas season. While this tradition isn’t unusual, it is actually kind of strange, especially if the sender mails them to every Tom, Dick and Harry on their Christmas card list. Trust us that only parents and extremely close family members actually care enough to not throw the card away right after they read it.
THE NEW YEAR BALL DROP
Since 1907, Americans have clamored to catch a glimpse of New York City’s Time’s Square ball drop in celebration of the New Year. Except, how does that have anything to do with a New Year? Apparently, the practice of ball dropping is an old sea captain’s trick for measuring time, and on New Year’s we’re counting down the time from one year to the next. Although it makes sense, it would be much cooler if it was, say, a giant hourglass. Chalk it up to another way American traditions are as weird as they are wonderful.
