FUNERAL HOME COLOGNE
More than just a gag gift, Demeter’s Funeral Home Cologne Spray earns positive reviews from consumers for its clean and light scent. According to the company, it’s designed to smell like classic white flowers, including lilies, carnations, and gladiolus, with a subtle hint of mahogany and Oriental carpet.
(One reviewer complains it smells too much like embalming fluid, but we’re not sure how serious they are.) If “funeral parlor” is not the essence you’re aiming for, the company also offers Paperback, Mildew, Kitten Fur, and Condensed Milk, among others. The best part is telling people what you’re wearing.